This week I was advised that EMCF Administration has entered a “Keep Separate Order” for me and Latonia, as such we are not to have contact. The first thing I thought about was the future of our child. As current I am not even allowed to help Bellamy with placement options for the child. I am not even allowed to hear the heart beat of the child. Perhaps more ironic was the timing. Administration entered this keep separate order when they received me and Latonia’s request to marry. Sadly, the reality is that administration is doing everything to ensure that this unborn child has a difficult life and absent parents. We wanted to discuss placement options and medical issues but now with a keep separate order, what do we do? They are angered that a transgender woman is still fighting against oppression.

None of this pregnancy was planned; yet now that it’s happened me and Latonia are trying to be responsible adults and plan appropriately for this child. Yet Because I am a woman who is transgender The Associate Administrator Ryan O’ Dea has ordered me to be shipped out of state and said that I am a threat to all the “cisgender” women here. Now the administration is ordering a keep separate order not because any of us said we felt unsafe, instead the keep separate orders are because I am transgender and a pregnancy occurred. To many people they have stated that women do not have rights over their body hence they are not permitted to be pregnant. I never said I don’t feel safe around the parent of my child, in fact I just asked to marry Latonia which is most likely why these orders were entered. And now with these orders more than likely my request will be denied.

The administration refused to enter a keep separate order against me and another inmate who abused me, they cited that I am in solitary and was only sexually harassed hence no keep separate is needed. Despite the fact that I stated I did not feel safe, the truth is I have to wait until the inmate does something to me. Yet staff wasted no time after seeing that me and Bellamy were asking to marry to enter keep separate orders. Its things like this that cause serious depression and the deterioration of ones mental health.

I am trying to hang in there yet the truth is Mr. O’Dea has refused to even speak to me when I ask to speak with him, everyone is attempting to ignore me, and its solely because of my gender identity, reality is I am no different than the 30-40 other inmates that are disciplined each year for similar infractions. None of them have ever been given keep separate orders for being in a relationship. I WAS NOT RAPED AND I DID NOT RAPE ANYONE. Yet in EMCF, if you are a transgender woman you are a predator. Its a heteronormative ideology that has allowed real sex abuse to continue hear.

What do I do when this child is Born? How do I go about visits? Is Administration saying that this child must never be in the same room with both of its parents? When visits happen are they saying that the child must be hauled back and forth to prison because both parents would need separate visit days? Please take notice that this treatment is disgusting and is relative to the fact that I am transgender; had I not been transgender no inmate would be pregnant? Yet because I am and because this has happened EMCF administration is doing everything to destroy what ever bond I could have with my child.

I am disgusted, and yet I am human and to see the blatant discrimination that continues to happen, I ask how do yaw expect for us to feel equal when your highest staff won’t see us as equal. This situation happened and any judge or jury can we the difference in treatment yet staff are simply like “you got someone pregnant” with all due respect that is not appropriate and its not what In was charged with. Yet now staff are using my. RHU sanction to punish me for something I was not charged with. I respectfully ask that you speak with me, during this whole time Administration has not spoken with me with the exception of Superintendent Fusaro. Yet, I have no understanding of any of this, and more concerning no one cares about my view of safety, they think these keep separate orders will make things better? This absurd and above all abusive towards a child that has not entered this world yet.

Finally, this has happened we are here, and t least that I can ask, please stop taking your hatred or dislike for what happened out on Bellamy, these action are having a huge negative impact on IP Bellamy and they will have even harsher impacts on this unborn child. With all due respect we have to acknowledged that this happened, there is no looking back a child will be born. The EMCF administration is creating barriers that are unnecessary and abusive. Its almost as if they expect me to walk away from Bellamy and than what? Marry someone else? Go to another relationship? Again this is wrong and the true consequences that it will have is extraordinary.

To everyone who sees the wrong in this email DOC and express your concerns
info@doc.nj.gov